Christmas 2011

Since the first advent calendar was such a success among my friends, I wanted to make a new one the next year. In 2011 the focus was more on Christmas and traditions than the year before.

1.desember

December 1st: Haslenisse-dorullnisse.
In the myriads of tacky Christmas decorations, we can find the Haslenisse. They are wonderfully detailed and well done, with huge hands and a face that promises to strangle you in your sleep.
I don’t care much for these.

2.desember

December 2nd: Julebord-lady-dorullnisse.
The previous year we took a look at the male dorullnisse going to julebord. This year I made the female one. I use the term “lady” quite loosely here – there should be more boots, heels, hair, cleavage and makeup than dress.

3.desember

December 4th: Writing your name in the snow-dorullnisse.
A dear wintertime tradition.

4.desember

December 4h: Freshly baked gingerbread men-dorullnisse.
Notice the gingerbreadmen… They are toilet rolls too. Get it?

Did you get it?
You got it.

5.desember

December 5th: Snow angels-dorullnisse.
This dorullnisse has just come in after making angels in the snow. Oh no. Poor guy.

6.desember

December 6th: It’s for my friend-dorullnisse.
Christmas tree parties are a tradition. There should also be a Santa there, giving out bags of candy to all the children. Last there is that kid who’ll ask for several bags. They are for his friends. He is going to give them to his friends who are elsewhere right now. Bastard.

7.desember

December 7th: Julekvelden på kjerringa-dorullnisse.
We have a saying that translates to “As surprising as Christmas Eve on the housewife”. It sounds better in Norwegian. No matter how much you prepare, come Christmas Eve you are not ready. This old lady has a Christmas tree riding on her back, strangling her with a chain of Christmas lights. Two gingerbread are stepping on her head and a boxed gift is chewing on her hand as she is reaching for her rolling pin. Guess this Christmas Eve was a bit more surprising than previous ones.

8.desember

December 8th: Sølvguttene-dorullnisse.
Sølvguttene, meaning the Silver Boys, are singing Christmas songs on the TV every Christmas Eve at five in the evening, when it officially becomes Christmas. My family always eat Christmas dinner at five listening to Sølvguttene from the TV in the other room.
I can’t remember why I gave him an iPhone.

9.desember

December 9th: Mariah Carey-dorullnisse.
This is from the year she covered her own All I Want For Christmas is You. With Bieber. The video was totally inappropriate, with aging cougar Carey grinding in front of the poor boy.
Ho ho ho.
Also there was a lot of Nintendos.

10.desember

December 10th: Admiral Von Schneider-dorullnisse.
This one you got! Unless, of course, you are from the UK, where “Dinner for one” is originally from. You can Google it. Here in Norway, it´s been a tradition for ages, and it is ALWAYS broadcast on the day before Christmas Eve. This allows people to make fun of old people with dementia and alcholics. Ah, Christmas spirit.

I myself, like the rest of the world, prefer to watch this at new years eve, because the play takes place on a new years eve and they keep wishing each other a happy new year. But that’s just me (and the rest of the world).

11.desember

December 11th: Tofu-dorullnisse.
Celebrating the traditional hunt for the Christmas tofu.

12.desember

December 12th: Butter crisis-dorullnisse.
Christmas 2011 was troubled by a huge crisis. There was no butter. Everything we make around Christmas consists of butter. What were the people to do? I imagined this was something we’d remember for generations. The Christmas without butter. I wanted to be the first to make Christmas decorations commemorating the shortage.

But where was all the butter? Everybody had bought it. So there was no real crisis.

13.desember

December 13th: DIY-dorullnisse.
You can explain this yourself.

14. desember

December 14th: Doing it himself-dorullnisse.
This one wouldn’t wait one more day, so he started without me.

15. desember

December 15th: Crooked as my tree-dorullnisse.
Family tradition; being satisfied with the tree even before it is 90 degrees. What, it’s difficult! This year the tree was like 60 degrees, but I was done, I wanted to decorate it. The dorullnisse was inspired by the tree.

16.desember

December 16th: Soft gifts-dorullnisse.
This dorullnisse only got soft Christmas gifts. No kids want that.
I don’t want that.

17. desember

December 17th: Grandiosa-dorullnisse.
Norwegians love their frozen pizza and Grandiosa is king. Around Christmas time we eat 2.5 million Grandiosas and on Christmas eve over 200.000 Grandiosas are eaten.

18.desember

December 18th: Julebukk-dorullnisse.
Julebukk means Christmas Goat, and it is an ancient tradition originating in Ireland. The same tradition that later became the well known trick or treat-ing. Norwegians dulled it down and it is now basically kids going caroling and asking for candy. Often dressed up as nisser. This dorullnisse however goes back to the days of yore when they dressed up as real Christmas goats, using remains of real goats. Not too many kids still go julebukk.

Ironically many Norwegians are very anti-trick or treating, wishing kids could go julebukk instead.

19.desember

December 19th: Emotional birthday boy Sebastian-dorullnisse.
This year I was the teacher for a class of fifth graders. They decided to hide in the classroom and surprise me. They brought cake and candy, coffe, lemonade and gifts. I’m not a big cryer, but this had me burst into tears and I had to process it by making a dorullnisse.

20. desember

December 20th: Siw Anita Andersen-dorullnisse.
This is one of my favorite Norwegian comedians. She has starred in two Christmas Calendars on TV. Two mockumentaries, built as a reality gameshow.

21. desember

December 21st: Captured by a lovestorm Carola-dorullnisse.
Carola is a Swedish singer known not only for her many Christmas songs, but also for her entries in Eurovision Song contest and addiction to the wind machine. This dorullnisse is inspired by her routine in Captured by a Lovestorm, which won the Eurovision Song Contest in 1991.

22. desember

December 22nd: Ugly ornament-dorullnisse.
The ornaments we love to hate. We hate to put them out, but there is no Christmas without them. Mostly because you or somebody else made it as a kid.

23. desember

December 23th: Bambi on Ice-dorullnisse.
One of many cartoons that belongs to Christmas. Everybody loves watching the poor deer trying to skate. Nobody knows the rest of the story. We know the mom dies, we don’t want to see that. We’ll stick to watch his ice dancing routine.

24. desember

December 24th: “We can do it, we can do it”: Merry little helpers-dorullnisse.
Finally revealing how the dorullnisser are made: By my collection of helpful woodland creatures. Sorry to ruin the illusion.

 

Christmas 2010

These are the dorullnisser I made for Christmas 2010. There was no theme this year, I just wanted to make a calendar for my blog. Since I missed the tradition of making dorullnisser at school, I decided to revive the concept.

1.des
December 1st: Traditional dorullnisse.
I started out soft with a classic take on the dorullnisse.

2.des
December 2nd: 3m0 dorullnisse.
Then I continued with an emo version.

3.des
Desember 3rd: Marianne Aulie-dorullnisse.
Aulie is a Norwegian artist fond of pouring champagne over her paintings and showing off her badonkadonks.

4.des
December 4th: Julebord dorullnisse. 
Julebord is a Norwegian tradition. It literally means “Christmas table” and is a gathering of people, often your workplace. People drink, eat, drink, dance and drink. Not always the best combination for a night with the co-workers you have to se again on Monday. Merry Christmas!
Notice the sweaty armpits. They are not optional.

5.des
December 5th: Dorullnisse the day after.
Hungover from the julebord. Notice the painkillers and the open fly.

6.des
December 6th: “Blånisse”-dorullnisse.
When I was a kid, nisser were always red. Suddenly blue ones became acceptable, so I had to make my own verson of this blue nisse. I may have borrowed some inspiration from elsewhere, though…

7.des
December 7th: My Little Dorullnisse.
Notice the “cutie mark”.

8.des
December 8th: Jan Thomas-Dorullnisse.
Norwegian celebrity, famous for…something. He’s had his share of visits to the…dentist.

9.des
December 9th: Lady GaGa-dorullnisse.
Well, yes. As you can see.

10.des
December 10th: Mr. Hankey-dorullnisse.
A Christmas tradition. Right?

11.des
December 11th: Mother of all Santas; Oprah-dorullnisse.
You’ve been a good kid! You’ve been a good kid! You’ve been a good kid!
Everybody’s been a good kid!

12.des
December 12th: Aylar-dorullnisse.
Once an adult film star, now a household name, somehow.

13.des
December 13th: Santa Lucia with the big boobies-dorullnisse.
The Swedish tradition of celebrating Lucia, who nobody has the slightest idea of who is, has become a Norwegian tradition as well. We celebrate her with saffron buns and walking around with candles on our head. Some cities also pull a Trump and choose a beautiful Lucia to light the Christmas tree. 

14.des
December 14th: Commercial dorullnisse.
Sponsored by all the biggest brands.

15.des
December 15th: Greylies-dorullnisse.
These little creatures are called Greylies. I write stories about them. They are not normally made of toilet rolls, but you can buy the e-book here: Greylies 

16.des
December 16th: Golden statue actor-dorullnisse.
Inspired by those guys who dress up like a statue on Oslo´s parade street to entertain the passer-bys, especially those who only make half an attempt.

17.des

December 17th: Woody-dorullnisse.
From Toy Story. My birthday was coming up, and I wanted people to know what I wished for.

18.des

December 18th: Buzz Lightyear-dorullnisse.
I wasn´t going to let anyone miss the hints.

19.des

December 19th: Sebastians 30th birthday party-dorullnisse.
Here I am at my 30th birthday. With all the Toy Story toys I got. Aaaaw you guys. How did you know?

20.des

December 20th: Petter Northug-dorullnisse.
Northug is a skier or something. I guess he is kind of famous if you are into that sort of things. I’m not. This is taken from one time he got in second and didn’t bother to show up for the ceremony to receive his medal. Not my kind of sporty. 

21.des
December 21st: Politically correct dorullnisse:
Gendlerless, no skin color, eye color, hair color, not mocking or celebrating anyone…not even a toilet roll…

22.des

December 22nd: Clown of the Jungle-dorullnisse. 
From the Donald Duck short “Clown of the Jungle.” You can´t have Christmas without it.

23.des
December 23rd: Ingrid Espelid Hovig-dorullnisse.
Celebrating one of the most famous and definitely most beloved Norwegian TV chefs of all time.

24.des

December 24th: An honest, tired pile of dorullnisser.
Guests to my house this December kept asking for my dorullnisse collection. Sadly, the truth was I didn´t have 24 toilet rolls, so I had to reuse most of them, until they were …well.. trash. Again. The last dorullnisse this year was a tired but honest pile of them all.

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